Volume 50 Issue 6 - June 2012 : Others

 

If you are a man, it would be wise if you checked your socks before reading this article. Are you wondering why? Well, here is the shocker. The chances are that you could be wearing mismatching socks or they have holes either at the heels or at the toes.  Worse still, they could be stinking nauseatingly.

Women in particular talk of men who make love with their socks on. Some talk of men who crisscross the floors with their socks on. Yet others talk about those who dress decently save for mismatching or stinking socks. Incidentally, the facts on the ground make for grim reading. Former director of a Gaborone-based company called Sands of Time, Shimane Marumo, once treated people to a good laugh. One fateful morning after he suddenly felt dizzy, he rushed to a nearby government clinic. And guess what, the most embarrassing thing happened to him at the clinic.

When Marumo removed his shoes, as is tradition when one has to stand on a scale to measure their weight, a pair of ragged socks stuck out and what a dole of humour to the multitudes of other patients in the vicinity.

At the toe-end of the socks, there were gaps that looked like the mouth of a dead bubble fish. Patients were at pains to suppress giggles as the otherwise elegantly dressed man preceded to the scale with apparent shame.

Sickly though he was on this day, he says he went to the clinic full of poise, yet when he left he was as timid as a stray dog. 

“I had gone to the clinic with great strides and left it with small ones,” he says, adding that after he had measured his weight he was so embarrassed that all he wanted to do was to melt into thin air.

“As I waited in the queue for consultation all the eyes were piercing through me like a knife through a piece of meat, and I asked myself if I could not afford a decent pair of socks,” he recalls.

Another funny story is that of Cedric Nkalonyane. His doom was sealed one Saturday afternoon while he and others were watching a derby between Gaborone football giants, Township Rollers and Gaborone United, at his girlfriend’s house.

Out of courtesy, Cedric felt the urge to take off his shoes right at the door to avoid tainting the white clean floor carpet in the living room.  

No sooner had he done such than there was a heavy silence fit to be cut with a razor blade.  That was despite the fact that loud conversations reigned in the house prior to Cedric’s arrival.

The stench from his socks was enough to force the girls for a gulp of fresh air outside. After a while one of the girls opened the living room windows and one by one they vanished into inner rooms until a thunder of laughter filled the whole house.

“I was disappointed that I had embarrassed my girlfriend and eventually I made an excuse to escape the embarrassing situation, and there was a sigh of relief from the girls as I bid them a goodbye,” he says. 

There are plenty funny stories as Premier Soccer League (PSL) manager, Setete Phuthego, attests to Kutlwano.  He says in his early days he used to have nasty experiences with socks. 

“I usually found myself with mismatching socks or socks torn at the heels or toes,” recalls Phuthego. 

The problem, quips Phuthego, is that when one wears socks they think no one will notice because they are worn inside shoes and also covered by the trousers.  

Unfortunately, often when the moment of awkwardness comes it makes one wish they could have done things differently.

Even today, he observes a lot of men still struggle to deal with their socks. 

“I see it everyday in meetings and public events. People of reputation still struggle to relate better with socks. 

Once they take their seats they expose either mismatching or loose-fitting socks that cause a great embarrassment when those who hold them in high esteem notice the wacky elements,” he reveals.

Btv news anchor, Keneetswe Thekiso is one of the women whose husband is struggling to have a peaceful relationship with socks. 

“He wears them until they are torn at the toes and when I notice that I simply buy him a new pair,” she says. 

Thekiso posits that a man with mismatching or smelling socks turns her off. “The person looks very funny especially if they are wearing a suit, and men are generally lazy to do their shopping hence they have a problem with socks,” she observes.

An article in the UK Sunday Times newspaper states that the owner of Black Shoes Company, Sammy Liechti, established his company as a result of the embarrassment he often suffered regarding his socks. 

Relating one of his experiences, Liechti says once he had been invited to a Japanese tea house, and everything was okay until he removed his shoes. 

He not only noticed that he was wearing mismatching socks but they were torn and dirty too. The embarrassment was so bad that it drove him to start a socks company, states the article.

The paper reveals that socks with holes portray one as either lazy to go and buy a new pair, or worse, one cannot afford a pair. 

“These holed items will be devastating to your outfit no matter how great the outfit looks,” states the article. 

As such, next time you dress up for an important social occasion, be mindful of the kind of socks you complete your gear with, lest you have one of those ungentlemanly moments with your socks.

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