Volume 50 Issue 7 - July 2012 : Others

If you thought it is just in the private sector where there is fun, you are wrong. Savor this; this morning when I left the newsroom to a private alcove where I normally write my stories in quiet, I bid my colleagues farewell to which one of them said, “As if you will be missed” and there was thunderous laughter. Working for the public service in other areas has never been as much fun as working for the Kutlwano magazine, which you probably would want to rename “the madhouse” if you were a staffer. It is jokes galore and play in this little office.  And it is out of the jokes and the play that we find the soul of our stories.

Here, the word “boss” is alien.   Do you really need to remind people that you are the boss every time? That I guess would spook me and my colleagues as we are not used to such jargon. Our diverse nature is what has firmly held us together and kept the pulse of the magazine beating. First is Thomas, the editor, who has earned himself the nickname, “the philosopher,” because of his tendency to treat intelligence or wisdom as his personal properties and treating those who exhibit the virtues with mock contempt.

He finds delight in bringing philosophical solutions to even the simplest of the problems.  Once he accused me of trying to be his disciple. Well, that was after he realised I had also eaten the ‘wisdom fruit’ and was like him!  Determined, orderly and collected, Thomas is a career civil servant and journalist – and a funny dancer. Then there is Lucreatia or rather the “The Look,” a self-declared Christian who has a penchant for parading her wealth. After all the world and all in it, including riches, belong to her heavenly father, she says. And no, sir she will not apologise for living good!

You will know her desk when you decide to visit us – and her. It is the one with post cards, and always a water bottle. If you are lucky you will find all her three cellphones, all for the three mobile networks, on her table. To identify her, look for the pretty woman with expensive ear rings or bracelets or chain. Better you could bring us some Chicken Licken or KFC. The woman you see gnashing her teeth will be her. She simply hates junk food. Well, she is also the noisier of the lot, with yours truly perching at the second spot. Of course I prefer not to be outdone by her and I am often the one asking her to “give us a chance” during conversations.  And who else would ask a question and interrupt your thought pattern by screaming out the answer, but Lucrecia?

When in her best of moods, she would pose for us like a model - a seductive look on her face. (I hope they don’t read this at home). Then there is her neighbour Keonee, a rather reserved individual who recently joined Kutlwano magazine from the Lobatse Information office. Naturally, given her personality she enjoys working in silence, commenting only occasionally on topics being discussed in the newsroom. Somewhere in the far right corner is Pako, “mr success”. A colossal of a man, when in a good mood, he prefers to be called PK. No do not call him a glutton, but this bloke can eat better than an elephant. PK is a social butterfly with an insatiable appetite for posing with famous people during high-class events. On his desktop, he poses with famous people such as former South African president Thabo Mbeki, Former president of Botswana, Sir Ketumile Masire, leader of opposition Botsalo Ntuane and South African muso Ringo Madlingozi while a self-crafted motto, “Damn I like the life I live,” declares to whoever cares to read that he is a happy man.

JB, real name Baleseng has an unpredictable character. You can never really understand this dude as one day he comes from home and spends the whole day in quite recess, only to come back the following day full of warmth and fighting for the spotlight in the newsroom. Bring a woman to smother JB’s ego, and be his friend forever. Especially when he is brooding, JB is easily eclipsed by the radiant beauty of his neighbour Ludo, call her Ludacris if you like. We have always suspected that this full-figured Eve must be the source of our greatest misery – the constant visits by the Adamites to our newsroom who merely want to “to check” on our progress. Would you believe the blokes don’t even work for Kutlwano? Now that you have a picture of the woman, you will be happy to know that she is also resourceful and very kind.

Then we have Chamo, the veteran in the newsroom. He just returned from further studies in South Africa and seems to be still relying on those thick textbooks – but don’t ask him, he will deny it. If you want to know what a funny character Chamo is listen to his weekend stories, but carry a bandage to hold your tired ribs. Perhaps he didn’t get these foods in Mzanzi but the man has an insatiable appetite for traditional food such as tripe, kidneys, bogobe, dikgobe, and mokoto. Well, then there is me, I do not know that much about myself except that, Thomas the editor, calls me a psychopath, while Lucretia says I am Mr Bean. Even the well-bred Ludo finds pleasure in calling me Zadele  - for confusing Adele’s song with Zahara’s, while Chamo thinks I have a cantankerous and impish character. The names are just too many and I cannot find their meaning. They were all given during the fun that is learning and talking in the newsroom. That, by the way, is the band that holds the team together. ENDS

Buy Online Now!