Volume 52 Issue 2 - February 2014 : Feature
Old love tit-bits
Author : Ndingililo Gaoswediwe
Before the advent of modern technology and multi-media tools such as computers and cellphoness, love used to trigger strong feelings of adoration and affection that inspired lovers especially men to express their emotions through poetry.
That was a time when couples would dedicate love songs to their better halves or steal pick-up lines from great writers such as Shakespeare, Thomas Hardy or Oscar Wilde. Distance was not a factor. Letters bridged the gap as the post man played the critical role of a go-between. In this piece harks back to that time of writing letters and imagines how couples would have expressed affection for each other as they celebrated Valentine`s Day.
ROLL DOWN TO YOU***KISS BEFORE YOU READ
Time and ability plus double capacity has forced my pen to dance automatically on this benedicted sheet of paper. Why! This miraculous thing happened because I love you spontaneously and as I stand horizontal to the wall and perpendicular to the ground I only think of you. To me each day starts by thinking of you and ends by dreaming of you. Each time I see you my metabolism suddenly stops and my peristalsis goes in reverse gear. My medullar oblongata also stops functioning.
**PDNF** Please Do Not Fold
If words of love could ride a bicycle, I would be competing against Diego Maradona. Please always write to me because I am always missing you like tea misses sugar.
- You stand accused as a thief my love, having stolen my heart although I don`t want it back. I love you more than the way a snake loves a rat.
- Double capacity plus three quarters majority have forced me to write this missive to you my honey bunch.
- I want you to be the only sugar in my tea, the only fly in my ointment, the butter on my bread, the grey matter of my system, my oxygen the container of my heart, the planet of my universe, the wall clock of my room, the conveyor belt of my soul. I pray that you realized the gargantuan nature of my predicament. If you refuse, my life will be like tea without sugar, like a snail without shell, an Xmas goat without a horn; in fact I`d become an orphan.
- My sweet chocolate, how are you? This side I am half lemon half sugar which makes me Schweppes because the sweetener of my heart is not with me.
- A man without love is like a fish without water. You are my sagacious girl! The apple of my eyes, my chocolate my honey!
- You are the paraffin of my premier stove.
- DEAR SUGAR
Time and ability plus double capacity has forced me to jot this letter as this pen dances on a piece of paper like me and you rolling down in the green grass of Chicago.
Now times have changed, instead of the post office it`s the server and instead of P. O. Box…its twitter handle, whatsapp, email, and facebook. Catch you later! Sleep tight and don`t let those bed bugs bite you because you are too sweet for them. Ends.