Beating the odds to live like a king
Source : Kutlwano
Author : Ludo Chube
Location : Gaborone
Event : Interview
The key to achieving career success is to have clearly defined goals, decide what is it you want to do in life, and then identify some attribute you are very good at - something you love doing, and then find someone to pay you to do it.”These insightful words came out of none other than popular South African television programme host, Bonang Matheba’s mouth during a visit to Botswana recently. Addressing a groupof apparently enthusiastic young women, she said “I’m good at talking right, and guess what? They are going to pay me to do it, and I will work my ‘butt’ off for their money!”
Matheba, who hosts SABC1’s music programme Live, remembers the countless sleepless nights she had to endure as a little girl at Bophelong Unit 8 in Mafikeng. Those were hard times when she and her siblings had to do with very little or no food at all.
“It was a struggle for us going to school on any given day due to lack of food,” she told the apparently sceptical audience during her inspirational talk.
The audience could be forgiven for their disbelief because Matheba’s current status and apparent affluence belies the pitiable past she said she had had to experience.
In any case, the young lady is what she is today because she did not allow poverty to disadvantage her. “From the early days I decided that that wasn’t how I wanted to live my life,” she said.
Similarly, she said her mother vowed that her daughter would live a betterlife,andforthatshewouldmake sure that she went to good schools no matter how poor she was.
Although it seemed an unbelievable promise, for “at the time my mom only earned a paltry R500 against the R1000 per month school fees, I had faith in her,” she said.
As luck would have it, Matheba’s wish was granted as she found herself among the students who matriculated in 2005, thanks to her determination and that of her mother, she recalled.
And, as they say, the rest is history. Now one of South Africa’s celebrated individuals, Matheba’s rise to fame started when she snatched the golden opportunity of hosting SABC 1’s music programme Live.
She told the audience that that stintwas enough to usher her into the celebrity world, making her an instant household name in South Africa and beyond.
Since then Matheba has graced the covers of almost all the South African magazines but one; Playboy S.A, which she apparentlyhashadtoturndownonmoral grounds.
It is amazing that she was the first black female to be featured on the cover of FHM magazine which is predominantly for the white market.
She has also been hailed as a style & fashion icon and has been named South Africa’s most followed woman on twitter and Facebook.
Her rise to fame was not an overnight occurrence though, as one can imagine. Like a lot of people, success was not handed to her on a silver platter, rather, it took years of perseverance; of faith; of proving her worth to fight for a break into the industry she is in today, she said.
As indicated earlier, the celebrity’s early days were characterised by challenges and struggles, particularly because she was brought up by a single parent, her mom, she said.
Fortunately her mother supported her dreams and was willing to put her first, all the reason why she worked hard to realise her dream, she explained.
She recalled the most defining moment in her life. She was watching V-Mash on television one Friday evening at around six O’clock, was presenting Jam Alley.
“That was when I decided that television work was something I wanted to do; I wanted to be in the entertainment industry, although the big question was how,” she shared her inspiration with the seemingly keen audience made of up of mostly young women.
From that moment, she said, she made her decision to be on television. Thus, she made it a point to do whatever it took to break into the most enviable television industry.
To realise her dream it meant attending countless and any auditions that were on offer at any given time. “I understood that I had to start from the very bottom and when you want it to happen so badly you want the bottom to be just about anything,” said Matheba.
Matheba remembers her agent sending her for auditions on a sanitary pads advert and alcohol, amongst others.
She said once she saw an advert in the classified section of a newspaper in which people who wanted to break into the television industry were invited. To her dismay when she enthusiastically called the concerned advertisers up she discovered that there was a R3 500 fees.
She said her ever supportive mom’s response was that “my daughter, if this is something you want to do then I’m going to help you out, le fa ke sa itse gore R3 500 o tlaa tswa kae.” And sponsor her daughter she did, thereby laying the foundation for Matheba’s subsequent exploits in the television world.
What she said people did not know is that she got her first job after more than 15 auditions! She remembers crying after the 16th audition proved futile and she was now on the verge of giving up.
However, she was almost giving up when on the 17th audition she got the much anticipated call, which said she had finally succeeded. “Because things don’t happen on our time, but on God’s time, the moment you want to give up think about why you held on for so long,” she shared.
Even then it was not the kind of breakthrough she had in mind because she said it was just a three minute show. Though short she was elated nonetheless because it earned her a whooping R1000 monthly; and, wasn’t that big money for a 17-year old school leaver!
Spurred on by the first success, Matheba went for more auditions getting yet another three-minute show in the process, she said.
For four solid years she was stuck with three-minute shows until she decided she wanted more for herself. Unfortunately, as she realised, she had to start from the bottom to get to the top in this cutthroat industry, and that it might take some time, she said.
In her own words she “needed to work her butt off” before she got anything remotely close to what she felt she deserved.
She auditioned for just about any show she could think of. For instance, “I auditioned for the Real Goboza, Live Lotto draw, Live, and Yo-TV,” she revealed to her already impressed audience.
At the Live programme she was called for a second audition but it was decided she was not the right candidate. However, three months later they called her again and went “nay, sorry we made a mistake!” Lady luck must have smiled on her as she was called yet again for yet another one of their auditions.
“I got into that room and I knocked their socks off. Four months later I got a call from them and they congratulated me for getting the job,” she announced confidently.
By then she did not even remember what audition this was since she had been to many of them. In her dramatic tone “I kept asking what show is that again, and when I found out I knew at that moment that it had been worth the wait and all the disappointments, all her perseverance had finally paid off,” she said.
All the years of fighting so hard to get something that was more than a mere three- minute production had finally ended, and behold, a new chapter had begun.
Matheba started as a ‘side kick’ and she did it for three to four years without complaining because she said she understood that there was hierarchy in any organisation.
“When I started this job I understood that Andile was there, which means I was second, I needed to work hard to get to Andile’s level though.
Also the easiest way to respect somebody is to respect their time, she said, adding that she is always on time, which earns her a good measure of respect as a serious individual.
During the talk, Matheba revealed that she was asked by one magazine how she had managed to stay that long with the show whereas so many people had failed.
Her answer was that she respects the people that she works with; she understands what is expected of her and she does not take her work for granted. Finish and klaar!
Further, when one of South Africa’s popular magazines, Drum, asked her what she wanted to achieve in the show she said “I want to be the best presenter on television my country has ever seen. I am at a point where my craft is so important to me that I live, breathe and sleep it every minute of the day.”
Matheba believes a lot in her independence, in fact, that is what she says defines the woman of the 21st century. Having been brought up by her mother after her parents’ divorce, she said she saw her mother do everything for herself.
In turn, she has learnt to be an independent woman so much that she now pays for her own hair, bought her own car, and just recently, a pent house. “My boyfriend hardly ever pays for anything,” she revealed, much to the cheering of her audience.
The modern 21st century woman is someone who stills power within themselves, who is inspirational and ambitious, Matheba opined, adding that, certainly anyone would want that for themselves.
“I don’t know about your country but in South Africa our men are USELESS! I’m yet to meet a man who is eager to pay for my food bill,” she yelled dramatically, much to the enjoyment of her audience.
Besides her success, it would appear the TV lady has had a fair share of drama; painful drama for that matter. In 2009 the South African media reported that her then boyfriend had unceremoniously dumped her via Facebook. Amazingly she did not lose her cool, and handled the public scandal with maturity and composure. “My belief is that as a woman you must have the grace, the poise, the dignity, and the humility. Do not lose it or get up in the face of the other woman if you have lost your man to her,” she said. Matheba advised that one should not confront the people that have done one wrong because “the universe and God will do a far much better job than you can.”
She credited the famous book The Secret for changing her life. The main concept of the book is that what you give out into the universe is what you will get in return.
She said it is the same book that has inspired her to buy Mini Cooper S, expansive though it is. “If you want something, believe in it and live as if you already have it and then the universe will respond to your faith,” she stated.
For instance, if one wants to have a car, they should get to the dealership and ask to test drive that car, feel how it is to own a car and, once one has that feeling, it will make them work 20 times harder to get what they want. “That is exactly what I did with my Mini Cooper S,” she advised.
Through the same faith she recently managed to buy herself a pent house, she explained, adding that when you give out negativity, you get negativity in return.“What people don’t know is that you can have everything you want and more; the question is do you believe in it? Do you see it?”
However, she cautioned young people that they must understand that rejection is always possible during their career search, especially in the modelling and entertainment industry.
In a move akin to counselling, she said when someone rejects you it is not about you, rather, it is about the fact that you do not fit that particular project but something better is coming your way “because when God shows up, He shows off.”
Another one of Matheba’s revelation is that people are fooled by the glam and lights of the television and entertainment industry thinking that there is a lot of money to be made.
“The truth is that a lot of these people you see in the spotlight are broke. We are underpaid. Why do you think a lot of them die poor?”
Perhaps such reality is what pushed Matheba to expand her vision more and use her name to go into the fashion industry to even as far as designing her own line of handbags known as Baby Star.
She also has a clothing range Just B in which she collaborated with Legit stores. Matheba also ‘mcees’in various big events as well as hosting a popular radio show on YFM. Recently she struck a deal to have a page of her own on Glamour magazine in South Africa.
“The misconception about success, people think, is being on television. But success is finding your purpose, living it and fulfilling it the way God wanted you to. Success is not forcing yourself into places you aren’t supposed to be,” she said.
A strong believer in fate, Matheba believes that that if something is meant for you, it shall be given to you whether anyone likes it or not, and whether you believe it or not.
As somebody who publicly confesses to being a staunch believer in God, she feels that God gives to us so that He can give through us. “If you think of it, God gives to the givers, love comes to the lovers, happiness comes to the happy, and success comes to those who are hungry for success.
“And let me tell you ladies, the minute you taste success you’re going to want the whole package because success is so addictive,” she warned, cautioning, however women to carry themselves in a way they would want their daughters to.
Going back to her philosophy that people are products of their thoughts, she advises, “Stop the negative cycle right now! Before you were born God had a plan for you, so why are you getting all worried about what people think or say about you, form and create your own positive thoughts.”
The one motto that keeps her going in life is to “Rise above, To return hate with love, Kill them with kindness and then bury them with success. The biggest revenge in life is massive success!”
It seems this is a concept she lives by. Her success seems to be piling so much so that she is now being paid to tell people her story. And at the rate she is moving, South African boundaries might find her a little too much to contain as her stardom soars to even greater heights.
Teaser:
My belief is that as a woman you must have the grace, the poise, the dignity, and the humility. Do not lose it or get up in the face of the other woman if you have lost your man to her
