Kutlwano Magazine

Mmamalome

Esnathi, Matobo

25 March, 2014

KE DINALANYANA Mmamalome ke dumela gore game e le ruri ke boloi. Fa ke ntseng teng fela go a re ke tseye kana ke topole sengwe. Ke sego le go bona makolwane a a siameng mme fela fa ke ka mo etela ke ya go boa ke tsere sengwe e bo e le gone jaaka botsalano bo fedile. Ga ke sena le tsala epe e ke e etelang ntateng ya se. Fa ke tsena mo shopong pelo e a re ke latlhele sengwe mo bekeng. Fa ke bua jaana ke kobilwe mo tirong ka ke ne ke senyetsa babereki ba bangwe. Ga ke utswe kagore ke a tlhoka, go a re ke dire fela. Bangwe ba re ke loilwe ke ye go tsena mo dibafong kana ke ye kwa baruting ba e go ntsha letimone la teng. Ke kopa kgakololo e e ka fetolang botshelo jwame mmamalome. KARABO - Setlogolo, Ke maswabi gore o bo latlhegetswe ke tiro, mme gape ke go akgolelea gore o bo o lemogile fa o na le bothata ebile o batla tharabololo ya jone. Mme kana tharabololo e ka tswa kwa moding wa bothata. I kopanye le ba bogakolodi (counselling) jaaka bo mmaboipelego go go thusa go bona gore mathata a bakwa ke eng ebile a ka rabololwa jang.

Distressed Mother, Gabs

25 March, 2014

I DON’T TRUST MY BOYFRIEND WHEN IT COMES TO MY DAUGHTER Mmamalome, I am a forty year old mother of two, a boy and a teenage girl. The father to my children died some ten years ago and I have been dating someone for the past five years. Because my daughter is growing so fast and now in her teen stage I no longer trust my boyfriend or any man. I want to part ways with my boyfriend for the sake of my daughter. I just want to be the best mother. Am I being too overprotective or what? I need advice on what to do? KARABO - Setlogolo, you have not stated what makes you not trust your boyfriend around your daughter. Being a mother is challenging and I understand that you want the best for your children. As a mother you also have the responsibility of protecting your children, which means you cannot have a relationship with someone who you cannot trust. However, I suggest you think hard about what you want to do to avoid regrets.

Two tigger, Gabs

25 March, 2014

BANYANA BA TRICKY! Mmamalome, Ke bone bati ya katse e ntsho e le gone ngwaga o simologang. Ke rre wa dingwaga di masome mararo le botlhano mme ke ntse ke wa ke tsoga le mmenyana mongwe re thusana matshelo. Pelo yame e ne e feletse mo go ene ebile ditsala tsame di re o njesitse. Le fa ke le motho wa di piece job, go ne go ka mpa ga lala nna tlala wa mmenyana ke mo diretse tsotlhe tse a di tlhokang. Fela maloba jaana ka keresemose ke ne ka mo neela P1000.00 a ya gae kwa Nkange mme se se neng sa mmakatsa ke gore o ne a sa nteletse le megala yame a simolola go sa e araba jaaka ke tlwaetse. E rile fela ka January ke fa a nteletsa a re ene o bone monna yo o nang le madi yo o kgonang go mo rekela dimpho ka nna ke a palelwa ke magogorwane fela. Ga se la ntlha Pungie a ntira jaana, fa go tla selo gatwe Valentine o sia le basimanyana a re ga ke beche ke tinto mme morago fa dilo di senyega kwa a teng o a boa a ikoba ka o e itse pelo ya lorato ke tla a bo ke e busa. Ke kopa thuso Mmamalome gore ke dire jang fa fro e ntsaya jaana, kana lenna ke motho ke na le maikutlo ke tla a tloga ke felela ke ile zanting? KARABO - Setlogolo, Lorato ga lo rekwe. Mosetsana yo o batla dithuso tsa gago eseng wena. Ikakanye gore a o tla kgona go tswelela o ratana le motho yo o ntseng jalo. Basetsana ba ba ntsi , ebile o tla bona yo mongwe yo o tla go ratang ka dinako tsotlhe le ha o sena madi.

Distressed lady, Via mail

25 March, 2014

CAN’T COPE AFTER ABORTION Mmamalome, I had an abortion just over four weeks ago when I was a month pregnant. I didn’t want to do it but really it was for the best, my boyfriend and I were not ready for the responsibility and although we always had been extra careful accidents happen and we had to deal with it. He was definitely against keeping the baby and I convinced myself it was the right thing to do and so I went ahead. First of all I never expected it to be so painful although the bad pain only last a couple of hours no one warned me it would be like that and the cramps lasted for two weeks. For the first few days, I was emotionally ok, feeling relieved and still upset but aware that I had done the best for all parties involved. However for the past couple of weeks I have felt absolutely terrible. I feel so guilty and spend hours and hours crying and feel completely lost. I can’t eat, sleep or concentrate. Every day is a struggle, I feel like I can’t cope and have so little support. My boyfriend and I have started quarrelling almost daily and I know I have pushed him away a bit and have been emotional and upset a lot. I put on a facade every time I see him, pretend I am coping and this just makes matters worse when I am alone-I completely breakdown. I have never felt this distress and regret like this. I feel like I chose him over the baby and I don’t think I could have done it on my own. I really truly regret it now, I don’t know how to go on? Does the guilt and shame ever stop? KARABO - Setlogolo, I think the best thing for you is to seek counselling and have a heart to heart discussion with your boyfriend to avoid resentment and other issues that come with making such choices.

Boi, Francistown

25 March, 2014

KE BETELETSWE KE MOHIRI WAME Mmamalome, ke nna Boitumelo. Ke mosetsana wa kwa Damuchu wa dingwaga di le lesome le borobabobedi. Ke feitse form three mme e rile ke bona botshelo kwa gae bo thatafalela pele ke bo ke ngwega ke ya go batla tiro kwa Francistown. Rre yo mongwe o ne a mphira ebile a sena bothata jwa gore ke ka nna mo ga gagwe. Ke simolotse tiro fela go sena mathata mme e ne ya re morago ga kgwedi tse pedi ke fa e tla a re ke robetse ke fa rre yoo a tla a itatlhela mo dikobong tsame a bo a robala le nna ntle le go nthaya lefoko. Fa a fetsa ke fa a ya kwa kamoreng ya gagwe a bo a ema fa lobating lwa kamore yame a ntshupegetsa thobolo. Monna yo jaanong o mphetotse sedirisiwa sa gagwe mme sebe sa phiri ke gore ga a condomise. Mmamalome tsela pedi ke tseye efe? Fa ke bua ke tshaba gore lekgoa lame tla a nkoba mo tirong, gae gone ke tla boela jang ke dule ke sa laela ebile gongwe ke le mo mmeleng? KARABO - Setlogolo, ke maswabi ka se se go diragaletseng. Boitshwaro jwa mohiri wa gago ke jo bo maswe ebile ga bo a tshwanelwa go letlelelwa go tswelela pele. O tshwanentse go begelela ba se molao tiragalo eo, mme ebile ga o a tshwanela go tswelela o bereka mo lapeng la sera seo. Setswana sa re “goora motho go thebephatshwa”. Batsadi le ba masika ba tla go amogela fa o boela gae.

Thata, RANAKA

21 January, 2014

RRAAGWE NGWANAKE O GANA KA ENE Mmamalome Ke ne ka senyegelwa ke mmereko ngwaga ono mo go neng ga dira gore batho ba ke neng ke re ba ka nkgomotsa ba ntlhanogele le bone ebong rraagwe ngwanake le ditsala tsame! Ga ke sa tlhole ke tshela sentle gotlhelele ka gore rraagwe nnana o mo tsere le ngwanake o kganelwa go tla kwa go nna ka gore rraagwe are ga ke na mosola ka ke sa tlhole ke na le seabe sa madi mo kgodisong ya ngwana. Ke na le go etelwa ke badimo ka mowa wa gore ke ikgapele botshelo. Mo Kgweding e e fetileng ke ne ka rwala diete, a nanabela go ya go tlhola morwadiake sebata se go tweng rraagwe se ile tirong. Ke ne ka mo laela gore botshelo ba mpaletse mme ngwanake o ne a nkgothatsa a bo a mpolelela gore ke seka ka dira sepe se se bosula ka gore o a ntlhoka le ntswa rraagwe a sa batle go bona fa rabanyana yame e gatileng teng. Ke rata rraagwe ngwanake thata mo ke santseng ke eletsa re boelelane mme go thata a ko o thuse setlogolo! Thata Ranaka Setlogolo, ke maswabi go bo o latlhegetswe ke tiro mme ebile le ditsala di tlhanogile. Le fa go ntse jalo rragwe ngwana wa gago ga a na tshwanelo ya go go tseela ngwana ka gore ga o bereke. O na le tshwanelo ya go bona ngwana wa gago o sa kgorelediwe ke sepe. Ka jalo bona ba boipelego ba go thuse kgang ya gago gore o tle o bone ngwana wag ago. Go ikgapela botshelo ga go kake ga go tswela mosola mme ebile e tla bo ele go utlwisa morwadio botlhoko. Morwadio o a go rata, mme go bo o sa bereke ga go kake ga fedisa Lorato lwa gagwe mo go wena. Rragwe ngwana ene o itshupile gore motho yo o ntseng jang. O go rata fela fa o bereka, mme motho yo o ntseng jalo ga se yo o ka ikanyegang. Mo tlhokomologe, mme o lebagane le go godisa morwadio le go batla se o ka itshetsang ka sone. ENDS

Chick magnet, OODI

21 January, 2014

KE PALELWA KE GO NNA LE MOKAPELO A LE MONGWE Mmamalome Mmamalome ke kopa o nthuse ke na le mathata a go nna le motho wa mme a le mongwe ebile se se dira gore gongwe le gongwe kwa ke thibelelang teng kgwedi di ka nna pedi e bo ke setse ke nna le bakapelo ba le babedi kgotsa go feta. Ke dirwa gape ke gore batho ba setse ba nkitse lefatshe ka bophara ka ba mphile le leina bare ke nna chick magnet! Fa makgarebe a mpitsa ka lone ke tlhakana tlhogo! Ke lekile go ikgapha le gone go kopa bogakolodi mo makalaneng mme go padile. Malatsi a go golela pele mo ebile ke sa kgoneng go nna malatsi a le matlhano ke sa robale le motho wa mme. Jaanong ke lemogile gore ke tla swela mo toronkong ka ke na le bokoa gape jwa go sa dirisa sekausu mo ke setseng ke na le bana ba le bane ba ke palelwang ke go ba tlhokomela! Bangwe ba re ke ye deliverance kwa kerekeng mme ka tumelo yame e le potlana ga ke dumele mo masalamoseng. Ke kopa o nkgakolole ka gore ke lemoga fa ditiro tsame di nkepela lemena. Chick magnet Oodi Setlogolo, Maikarabelo go fetola boitshwaro jo bo maswe bo mo go monnga bone. Ga go na ope yo o ka go fetolang maitshwaro ko ntle ga gago. Ka jalo ke go gakolola go dirisa dikgakololo tse o di filweng ke ba bogakolodi, eseng jalo o tla thanya lomapo lo le tsebeng. ENDS

Moshe, PaALAPYE

21 January, 2014

KE THUBA PHUTHEGO KA BOITSHWARO JWA ME Mmamalome Ke moruti mo kerekeng ebile ke na le mosadi le bana ba babedi ba basetsanyana ba ke ba ratang thata. Ke ne ka segodiwa ka nyalo e e boitshepo ke ntse ke le mo kererekeng e ka ke goletse mo go yone. Jaanong e rile kereke e ntse e gola ga nna le ditlhabololo hale le hale batho le bone ba tla ka dipalo tse dintsi. Ke ne ka simolola go tsietsa mosadi wame ke sa mo fe lorato jaaka pele ke bona o kare ga a sa thole a le montle ka go na le makgarejwana a mantle a a ntlhakanyang tlhogo mo kerekeng. Maswenyana a ga mmaabo ke bona e ka re a a oketsega. Ke tlhakatlhakantse dilo mo kerekeng, bakaulengwe le bazelwane ba a lwa ntateng yame le kereke e ka nna ya phatlalala ka gore go na dingongorego tsa gore go na le bothata mo kerekeng le mosadi wame ga a sa thole a na le tshepho mo go nna. Ka tota tsa senama di etla di tsietsa le bone batlhanka ba modimo ke kopa thuso mmamalome! Moshe Palapye Setlogolo, Ga go ope yo o ka go latlhisang mekgwa e e maswe kontle ga wena monnga yone. Se o se dirang ke matlhabisa ditlhong ebile ke go diga seriti sa Boruti. Phuthego e o e eteletseng pele e lebile mo go wena go ba ruta tse di siameng mme ba tla latlhegelwa ke tshepo mo baruting le mo kerekeng. Latlha mekgwa e e maswe pele ga seemo se tswa mo taolong. ENDS

Thabo, TONOTA

21 January, 2014

KE ROBETSE LE NGWANA WA MOKAPELO WAME Mmamalome Ke step father sa ga Lame, mosetsana wa dingwaga di le masome a mabedi le bone. Ke ne ka sala le ene fa mmaagwe a ile tiriping ka a ne a utlwana le nna a felela ke robala le ene mo kamoreng. Re ne ra felela re ile go sele. Ke rata mmaagwe Lame mo e leng gore go ka se nne bonolo gore ke mo tlogele ka gore re tswa kgakala re wa re tsoga mmogo ebile ke ne ke setse ke akanya go mo nyala. Mmaagwe Lame o tsile jaanong Lame o ntshetse morago are nka se tshameke ka maikutlo a gagwe ebile fa nka se mo neele nako fa mmaagwe a ile tirong o tla mmolelela sengwe le sengwe ka nna le ene! Ke a tle ke etelwe ke mogopolo wa gore a ke mo nose bothole kana ke ye go mo kaletsa kwa sekgweng. Ke kopa thuso gore ke bue jang le Lame ka gore ke tloga ke diragatsa dikakanyo tse di maswe tse! Thabo Tonota Setlogolo, ga go na jaaka o ka tila ditlamorago tsa se o se dirileng. Phoso eo ga e a tshwanela go diragala gape ka jalo nna fa fatshe le Mmagwe Lame o mmolelele molato le tsotlhe tse di diragetseng. Ga o a tshwanela go letla Lame a go pateletsa go dira molato o gape, mme go emisa tshotlhe ke gore o bolelele Mmagwe Lame. Go nosa Lame botlhole kana go mo kaletsa e tla bo e le molato yo motona yo o ka felelang o o bolaetswe ka na o tsene mo kgolegelong. ENDS

Kabelo, MMADINARE

21 January, 2014

KE IPHITISA DINO Mmamalome Ke rre wa dingwaga di le masome a mabedi le bongwe mme ke na le mathata a go nwa bojalwa. Ke simolotse go nwa matute a morara ka 2006 go fitlhela gompieno. Ke lekile go bo tlhanogela mme go padile. Ke ile kwa dikerekeng ke re gongwe go tla nna botoka ga pala. Ke ikuela jaana ka gore ga ke sa tlhola ke nna le madi ka gore fa ke a tshwara fela ke ya bojalweng ka one otlhe. Go tlhoka madi mo jaanong go dira gore ke nwe bojalwa bongwe le bongwe e leng khadi, chibuku le mokoko o ntshebile ka a rekwa ka tlhwatlhwa tse di kwa tlase. Go nna ke tagilwe ke gone mo go dirileng gore le mme yo ke neng ke nna le ene a ineele a bo a boele ga bone ka gore ke nna ke nole hela! Mmamalome nthuse! Kabelo Mmadinare Setlogolo, go dirisa bojalwa ke nngwe ya dilo tse di tshwenyang lefatshe ka bophara. Ditlamorago tsa jone di akaretsa go senyega ga malapa le ditiro gammogo le malwetsi jaaka HIV/AIDS. Mme hela jaaka bothata bongwe le bongwe tshimologo ya tharabololo ke gore motho a lemoge ha ana le mathata mme ebile a na le keletso ya go batla thuso. Go tlogela bojalwa ga go motlhofo mme go ka kgonafala fa motho a na le maikaelelo. Ka jalo ke go akgolela go batla thuso. Ke go gakolola go ikopanya le mma boitekanelo gore a tle a go tshwaraganye le ba bogakolodi jo bo lebaneng ba ba tshwanang le Alcohol Anonymous (AA). ENDS